Home 2020 April 22 Drama at the groceries

Drama at the groceries


Perspectives from the Intuitive Cardiologist

Another exciting day. Goto the grocery store and go home. It seems I have fallen right into the Groundhog Day, week, month.

So off I goto the grocery store. As I am walking in, to get the shopping cart other customers are dawning their masks and gloves. They take the chlorine bottle spray and tissue wipes left next to the shopping carts and start cleaning away the handles.

I wondered if they spend this much of time cleaning their own homes. I also wonder should we continue this practice and institute this as mandatory everywhere forever ! It will certainly reduce the risk of common cold, the flu and a host of other viral and bacterial diseases that spread from contamination even prior to the corona saga.

I walk around the store and appreciate everyone else wearing their masks and gloves as I notice them touch all the vegetables I want with their cross contaminated gloves and then touch their face, their phones, their lists. Guess I am going to skip buying any vegetables today.

I go up instead to the deli, and the store attendant puts up her hand for me to stop where I am. I am little bewildered but I look to see that she is in fact communicating with me. Even though she is using primitive non verbal methods I understand somehow. I stop at the line 6 feet beyond the glass counter. She signals with me a nod to tell her what I want. I ask the lady ( who is not wearing a mask) some deli meat. She starts to process my request. Turns her head and coughs and sneezes. Great ! Guess going to add it to the list of things not to get.

She wraps it and then gives me the permission to come forth and get my consumable. I ask her cheekily to throw it from 6 feet away from behind the counter into my waiting shopping cart. She obviously refuses.

I carry on my journey amongst the sea of corona infested products in the store. I finally come up to the check out counter. I immediately get a hands up from the cashier to stay back and dont go over the big giant X on the floor that is 6 feet away from the cash desk. As I stood on the X I wondered if I was going to get hit by a targeting missile from space or will the store suddenly recognize me as a prize winner as I stand on the X. Or was I a life size piece on an elaborate chess kit making one half step moves on the floor.

The cashier gave me several fertile glances as I stood there day dreaming waiting for the customer ahead of me dressed up in a mask, bright blue gloves and other protective gear that looked like she was out hunting and not shopping, to finish her meandering and move forward. She pretended she cared about the contact of her products as they were bagged in by the unmasked attendant, yet went about completely oblivious of sterile procedures.

Penultimately the cashier gives me the hand gesture to hither. I smiled, deliberately waited for another 30 seconds and when our eyes locked I said “ Are you sure it is safe to come forward?”

She did not look amused. I started tossing the items from the shopping cart onto the carousel from at least 5 feet away. She said “ YOU CAN COME CLOSER” I complied as I had flash backs at being called to the principles office as a kid.

I completed the checkout experience in an effort not to be invasive with my sarcastic humor. I definitely saw numerous benefits of this new ritualistic socialism of social distancing. Fellow Customers appeared to be more polite or rather kept to themselves in fear, either way less talking. The shopping carts were being cleaned. Yet some things dont change.

Peoples carts were still full of processed foods, unhealthy sweet foods, high fat, high carbohydrate products. Right outside was a guy who took down his mask and lit up a cigarette. Yes why not weaken the immunity by destroying the lungs further so that the corona virus that attacks the lungs anyway is further supported.

Who needs Netflix ? It doesn’t get much better than this. Life is an experience. Its like observing life on a TV. Not sure sometimes which is the illusion? The TV show or the life itself. Time to change the channel.

Till the next episode of the drama series “ Doing the groceries”


I love you

Author: Brown Knight

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